I slapped my legs and snorted this morning while putting my groceries away. Who knew that listening to my kids’ English teacher talk about the schedule for the week would be so entertaining? I mean, yes, I also teach English and have been told on more than one occasion that my backup plan should be standup comedy, but today I found out that I’ll have some serious teacher competition.
After my long morning standing outside Publix along with other people who waiting six feet apart, I returned home to hear teachers and students chatting about school. My daughter sat on the floor with our dog and listened to her English teacher set them up for the week.
Between describing his filing system for assignments, he commanded a student to stop doing cartwheels. It was just too distracting.
I guffawed so loudly that my daughter shushed me. “Sorry,” I giggled like a kid.
Then, he told them how much he loved seeing them and that once they got used to the schedule and format, things would become more difficult. I think groaning followed. Or, maybe that was just me having a flashback when I had said the same thing.
His best joke involved his analogy between himself and The Shining by Stephen King. As he described where his assignments would appear, he warned the students to use excuses in only extreme situations.
Heed his warnings or else! He methodically told them that their assignments could be found in multiple places. There would be no escape. He creeped around every corner. He and his files breaking through imaginary doors. Hence, the shining analogy.
I clapped my hands and laughed so hard that my daughter snapped at me.
“Stop!” she blurted out. Then she laughed too.
Thank you to the teachers who are keeping it fun and especially funny.